9/28: Premiere episode full recap

Betty Suarez is waiting for a job interview at Meade Publications, a magazine publisher. The fashionable girl next to her is wearing a designer poncho. Betty tries to strike up a conversation, but the fashion plate is unfriendly.

A twerpy HR assistant comes out to call the next applicant, but when he sees Betty, he says all the positions are filled. She chases after him and tells him how much she wants the job, and how well qualified she is for it. (He keeps switching directions hoping to shake her loose, but she's tenacious.) She talks about all the things she's learned from their magazines - things that are "beyond her world." He pays little attention to what she says, but the company owner is hearing all of this. The twerp leads her to the front door and slams it in her face.

When Betty gets home, her father Ignacio is watching a telenovela starring Salma Hayek as a maid. Her nephew Justin wants to watch Fashion TV instead. Justin's mother (Betty's sister Hilda) offers him some flan, but he says he doesn't want to get fat. She tells him it doesn't matter if boys get fat.

Dad asks Betty about the interview. She says it went well, but Hilda knows better. Dad doesn't understand why Betty hasn't found a job yet - she's so smart, etc. Hilda thinks Betty should consider other options... Hilda prods Justin to tell Betty what he overheard. Betty's boyfriend Walter was on the phone with someone and said, "she's the one." They all assume that Walter wants to get engaged. Betty is surprised but delighted.

There's a knock on the door - it's Walter. He wants to talk privately. He doesn't understand why she seems so excited. He announces that he's in love with someone else. Betty is devastated. His new girlfriend, a neighbor named Gina, is watching all this from a doorstep. He wishes Betty luck and leaves.

Meanwhile, Justin is watching the news on Fashion TV. There's a story about the funeral of the editor of the big fashion magazine Mode. The anchor gives the shocking news that the publisher's owner named his son Daniel as new editor instead of promoting Wilhelmina Slater, the magazine's creative director, as everyone expected. Daniel has a reputation as an accomplished womanizer despite looking barely old enough to buy beer.

Also meanwhile, Mode's owner, Bradford Meade, pays his son a visit at the office. Daniel is obviously getting a blow job from his assistant, Charmaine - the fashionable girl with the poncho (I can't tell). Brad doesn't approve of this.

Back at the Suarez household, Betty is drowning her sorrows with food when the phone rings. It's someone from Meade Publications, offering a job as assistant to the editor-in-chief of Mode starting tomorrow morning. She's never heard of Mode, but Justin excitedly brings her a copy. She tells him that Mode wouldn't be her first choice, but with a job like that, she could get promoted anywhere within the company.

Justin tells Betty she needs to dress fashionably. Does she have anything? he asks doubtfully.
Betty remembers the poncho. "Yes, I do!"

The next day, Betty shows up at Mode wearing a giant red souvenir poncho with GUADALAHARA emblazoned across the front. The extremely snooty receptionist, Amanda, first asks Betty if she's the "before" for a "before and after" story; when Betty looks confused, Amanda sloooowly asks if she's delivering something. When Betty explains that she'll be working for Daniel, Amanda scolds her for coming in later than her boss (Betty was in HR filling out paperwork). Amanda is offended that Betty has been hired fresh out of college; Amanda had been told she didn't have enough experience for the job.

Betty gives herself a pep-talk before entering the glass-walled conference room where Daniel is holding a staff meeting. Then she walks right into the door. Daniel turns around and asks if she's okay. He's flustered by Betty's huge, metallic smile.

Wilhelmina - an imperious, glamorous, fashionably dressed, plastic-looking woman - shows up late with her puppylike assistant Marc in tow. (I'll call him Fido. Yes, I know that's an insult to innocent, lovable puppies everywhere.) She orders him around like a dog. "Gift," she says, and Fido hands Daniel a box. She demands that Daniel open it right away. It's an expensive crystal tulip in a crystal pot and is engraved "Danny." Wil takes over the meeting as if she's in charge. She warns Daniel that their biggest sponsor, Fabia, will need to sign off on the layout of their next spread. (Betty takes notes.) Then Willie adjourns the meeting! Daniel just stands there helplessly as his staff file out of the room.

Betty introduces herself to Daniel. He seems amused. A little while later, Betty does some online research about Fabia for Daniel. Amanda brings something to Betty and asks who Daniel's meeting with. Betty says it's a photographer named Phillippe (Betty is familiar with his work) and that they seem to be good friends. Amanda says there was some drama a few years ago - Daniel hooked up with Phillippe's ex-girlfriend once. But they're okay now.

Amanda dated Phil for about a week, she claims, and "they don't call him the Tripod for nothing." I can live with that. Henceforth, I shall call Phil The Tripod.

Daniel tells The Tripod that they're very close. Tripod agrees that they're like brothers. Daniel wants Tripod's advice on the Fabia layout. He doesn't trust Willie and suspects she's trying to sabotage him. The Tripod says not to worry - he has lots of ideas.Betty comes in and acts like a fangirl in front of The Tripod. She flatters him about some of his work, then inadvertently offends him by saying that one of his layouts reminded her of someone else's stuff. She wasn't implying any plagiarism, but he seems to assume the worst. Betty excuses herself and goes to lunch.

Betty looks for a seat in the lunch room. Amanda sees her and pointedly puts her purse on the stool next to her. Betty finally finds a seat alone, but is quickly joined by Christina, the wardrobe girl. Christina is very friendly to Betty. She refers to some of their coworkers - the fashionable ones - as "chic-ies." She introduces Betty to two unchic women named Nancy and Zelda. From a distance, Fido tells Amanda it's like a Bizarro World "Sex in the City."

Fido is giving Botox shots to Willie. Willie is griping about being passed over for the job and wonders if it's because she's getting old. Fido says no, and predicts that Daniel will soon fall flat on his face. He also complains about Betty's appearance, saying it's a fashion magazine, not Dog Fancy. (Strange words coming from a guy named Fido, eh? Yeah, I know I'm the only one who calls him that, but still.) Willie lets Fido keep the leftover Botox. Let's not contemplate what he'll do with it, shall we?

Willie gets a call on her cell phone. Fido looks over her shoulder, trying to see who it is, but Willie orders Fido to leave. He listens from a discreet distance. Willie asks someone how s/he's recovering and says s/he'll surely feel better once things around here (Mode) come to a boil.

Brad Meade meets with a man on a park bench. They discuss the previous editor's death. She knew too many secrets about Brad and the company, but now she's out of the way. Brad isn't happy that it was a closed-casket funeral; he's not convinced she's dead. (They don't come right out and say that they planned her death, but it's implied.)

Daniel tells The Tripod that Betty seems to be a good assistant, but Tripod says she's "fugly" and not good for Daniel's image. (He refers to her as "that.") Daniel protests that he can't fire her, so the Tripod advises him to "beat her down to a pulp."

Daniel calls Betty and says there's a problem with his cole slaw: it's full of cabbage. He wants her to pick all of the cabbage out of his slaw. This is followed by a montage of Betty doing all sorts of menial tasks for Daniel. He calls her super-early in the morning while she's still in bed to ask her to fetch special coffee for him. She has to walk his Great Dane, who is as big as she is. She sews for him. At night, she stands guard outside his apartment to let him know when a woman arrives, so he'll have time to get rid of the chick who's still in his bed. This particular task causes her to miss her father's birthday party. (Oh, and the chick who's in Daniel's bed? Amanda. She is under the impression that she'll soon be getting a promotion. Do women still fall for that one? I guess so.) Daniel tells Betty on the phone to stick around a little longer, just in case someone else shows up. She looks frustrated. The look on his face suggests a vague twinge of guilt, which quickly disappears when his next date shows up. (He hasn't even bothered to wash up or dress between dates.)

As Betty walks home, she passes Gina's house. Gina's window is open and Betty hears Gina fooling around with Walter. She gets home and Hilda scolds her for missing Dad's birthday. Hilda says it's the first time they didn't all get together for his birthday since Mom died. Hilda doubts that Betty's job is worth that much.

Betty flops onto the couch, exhausted. She sees a photo of her mom and gets an idea for work. She starts writing in her steno pad.

The next day, Daniel is preparing for a photo shoot for the Fabia campaign. As they head towards the studio, Betty, who is carrying some of Daniel's things for him, tries to tell him about her idea, but he ignores her until he needs something. He sends her up to Wardrobe to get an outfit for the shoot. There, she and Christina laugh about some of the overpriced fashions. Betty tells Christina that Daniel treats her like dirt. She shows Christina the idea she prepared for the Fabia campaign and says Daniel wouldn't even look at it.

Christina tells Betty that Nancy heard that Brad picked Betty to be Daniel's assistant because he knew that Daniel would never sleep with her. Betty is intrigued that Brad knows who she is, but she's depressed to know that she was hired for her frumpy looks and not her skills.

She leaves her Fabia report behind. Christina takes a look and apparently likes what she sees.
Over at the studio, Daniel and The Tripod are peparing for the photo shoot. They've decided to go with mild fetish clothing and a car-wreck motif. Amanda comes by to flirt with Daniel, but he doesn't have time for her. The Tripod is upset because their model isn't there yet for the test shots. Tripod needs someone with similar skin tones, someone who... he sees Betty and gets an idea. He thinks she'd rather quit than do it. Daniel asks her. She's clearly not happy. She obviously wants to refuse. She stomps away wordlessly.

Daniel tells The Tripod she's going to quit. The Tripod starts to gloat, but stops in mid-sentence. Betty has decided to stay and fight. She comes out of the dressing room looking completely ridiculous in thigh-high silver boots, black leather (or vinyl) hot pants, long red satin gloves, and a weird red vinyl (or leather) top with a mandarin collar and what I believe is called a keyhole neckline revealing some cleavage. She looks ready to cry, but gamely asks, "where do you want me?"

Tripod starts shooting. Betty looks very out-of-place. The other models, the entire crew, and Amanda are all laughing. Daniel yells for everyone to stop, but they can't. Betty holds out as long as she can, but finally cracks.

She runs out of there, out onto the street, without even changing her clothes. Daniel chases her, but she tells him she's giving him his wish. She tells him she knows that his father made him hire her.

Justin brings Betty some tea and says his mother isn't surprised this happened. Justin says Hilda thinks that Betty's dream of someday owning a magazine "doesn't happen to people like us" (presumably Latinos). Betty doesn't accept that but doesn't bother arguing - she hears Gina through the open window again and decides to confront her about Walter. She is surprised to see her with another man - Gina says she's already dumped Walter. She only wanted him for his discount at the electronics store. Betty slams the door so hard, Gina's big new LCD TV bounces off the wall and falls to the floor. Gina vows revenge.

Back at Mode, Daniel shows Fabia the car-wreck layout. Her big puffy lips curl in disgust. She calls him a stupid idiot and leaves. Fido tells Daniel that Fabia is probably still sensitive about an accident she had recently. Daniel looks at The Tripod, who claims he was out of town at the time and didn't know anything about it. Willie points out that Daniel didn't consult her in planning the layout.

Daniel's father, who is sort of working out (I'm not sure it counts if an assistant is lifting your limbs for you) at a place with a huge sign that says "GYM," warns Daniel that the Fabia account is too important to screw up. He's angry with Daniel for doing the layout without Willie's help, and indicates that he probably shouldn't expect so much from Daniel. Daniel asks for one more chance.

Willie and The Tripod are drinking champagne in bed. Willie is refusing Daniel's calls. The Tripod gloats that Daniel took the bait of distrusting Willie and taking The Tripod's advice. Now Daniel looks stupid and Willie will be able to save the day at tomorrow's meeting. They toast - Willie to teamwork, and Tripod to revenge.

After several hours of unsuccessful brainstorming n his office, Daniel finds the report Betty prepared with her idea for the Fabia campaign. He reads it with interest.

Meanwhile at home, Betty is on the phone with an HMO, arguing with some moron about her father's heart medication. They've arbitrarily decided to stop covering it. Betty's father thanks her for taking care of these things. She's strong and determined, just like her mother.

Walter shows up. He's upset that Betty hasn't been returning his calls. He insists that he dumped Gina, not the other way around, and that it was a mistake for him to give Betty up. Betty doesn't want to hear about it. He begs her to let him make it up to her.

Then Daniel arrives. Walter thinks Daniel must be Betty's new boyfriend. Daniel apologizes for his behavior. She doesn't want to hear about that either. Their lives are too different; he drives a nice car and can eat in cool restaurants and bang hot models in his loft while she has to fight for her dad's medication and work to pay the rent.

Daniel tells Betty that he lost a brother "a while back"; he was the "good one" and Daniel doesn't measure up in his eyes. He realizes their lives aren't much alike, but he knows nothing's easy for anyone. He says he saw her idea for the Fabia campaign and loves it. He wants to use it and will give her full credit for it. He begs Betty to come back to work for him. She says she needs to think about it. He says she only has tonight. Otherwise, he'll be out of work soon too.

The next morning, Fabia waits impatiently for the meeting to begin. Daniel's father is there, but Daniel isn't. Willie starts the meeting without him. She apologizes for yesterday's unacceptable presentation and is just about to pitch her own ideas when Daniel and Betty sweep in. They haven't had a chance to do a new shoot, but they've put together a sample with Betty's family photos. It's about mothers and daughters.

Fabia says that she just had a daughter (hilarious since she kind of looks like a man in drag), but doesn't do any of the things in those pictures. (Willie looks hopeful.) But, Fabia says, she sees the appeal. She just needs some evidence of why this might work. Betty has already prepared some facts and figures to support the concept. Fabia likes the idea so much, she doesn't even want to approve the models and photos in advance of publication. (Yeah, right!) She does suggest including a photo where they're pulling their hair or biting each other. :-)

Daniel's father congratulates them on their good work. Daniel starts to tell him the idea was Betty's, but Betty interrupts and doesn't let him. (Don't make a habit of it, Betty!) Willie offers her blatantly false congratulations.

Willie visits a heavily bandaged woman in a darkened room. I think we can assume that she's the previous editor of Mode, but let's just call her the Mummy to be on the safe side. (If she is the previous editor, she may have had some cosmetic surgery; we can see only her eyes, but in the fashion news show Justin watched earlier, her eyes were covered with huge sunglasses.) Mummy is very unhappy that Daniel won this round. Willie says it's just a minor setback; soon Daniel will be "out of the picture" and they'll gain control of the magazine. The Mummy is more worried about Daniel's "damn ugly assistant."

Betty thanks Christina for passing her report along to Daniel. Daniel thanks Betty for saving his butt, and then gets into the back of a town car where a feminine hand beckons.

Next episode:
Betty takes an important document home from the office, and Gina steals it and holds it for ransom; Gina and Hilda have a chicken fight.