It's Valentine's Day, 1962. Fourteen months have passed since the last episode.
Betty is taking riding lessons. I think the woman she's with is Mona (Roger's wife). Whoever it is is saying that her daughter Becky has been saving her lunch money in her pencil case. She is concerned about the dishonesty, but she and Betty agree that it's good that the girl is losing weight. This friend has been flirting with one of the other riding students, a guy who's 25. The friend and the young guy think that the riding instructor, Gertie, has a crush on Betty.
Don has to take a physical exam for insurance. At the ripe old age of 36, he has a blood pressure reading of 160/100. (A top number of 130 is considered high.) He tells the doctor he has five drinks and two packs of cigarettes a day. The doctor warns him about fast living, prescribes reserpine for his blood pressure and phenobarbital to help him relax. (Reserpine is much less popular now due to side effects; phenobarbital is still widely used for certain things, but is no longer the first choice for treating anxiety.)
Don is late for a meeting with the madmen. There's a plate of sandwiches, which they debate eating. Despite having been a junior copywriter for more than a year, Peggy is still treated like a secretary/waitress. They send her into the office to find out where Don is. While she's gone, they make wry comments about her being Don's favorite. One of them (Dale? - still learning their names) thinks Don knocked her up and that's why she disappeared for a few months and came back 9.5 pounds lighter. Pet is sure she went to a fat farm.
Lois, the woman who started out on the switchboard with a crush on Sal, is now Don's secretary. She tells Peggy that Don "said" he went to see Pinocchio. Peggy disapproves of the Lois's dubious look and tone, and scolds her harshly for being indiscreet. Lois is bewildered and upset by Peggy's attitude.
Don is having a big meat 'n' potatoes lunch at a bar. The man sitting next to him is reading Meditations in an Emergency by Frank O'Hara, some of which was written in the very same bar. Don wonders if he would like the book. The man notices Don's type-A attitude ("It's all about getting things done") and thinks not. Don smiles to himself at the man's presumption.
Roger has a talk with Joan. He's clearly trying to move on with Mona, just as Joan has moved on - she's dating a doctor and expecting a marriage proposal soon.
Duck, the manager of Account Services that Don hired at the end of last season, tells Roger he's worried about the Martinson's coffee account. He says the youngsters don't like coffee; people under the age of 25 drink only cola. Freddie, the account manager, doesn't even drink coffee. (Roger points out that Freddie doesn't wear a bra either, but he did okay for Playtex.) Duck thinks their staff is too old. Clients want young writer/artist teams. He asks Roger to talk to Don about getting someone like that, just for the coffee account. Roger asks Duck why he can't talk to Don directly. Duck thinks he's supposed to do everything through Roger rather than deal with him directly. It seems that he needs Roger's advice on how best to approach Don.
Don finally shows up for the meeting. It takes the madmen a moment to get back into the business mood after waiting around for him and gossiping for over an hour. The account is Mohawk Airlines. The staff have clearly been having some trouble coming up with a concept. Don is negative and sarcastic about all of their ideas. He babbles something about Indians and adventure and pirates and conquistadors. "Blah, blah, blah, blah," he concludes eloquently. (Possible interaction of alcohol and phenobarbital?) They're all confused. He babbles some more about a skirt that's a little too short. That's the impression he leaves them all with. He wants to see more tomorrow.
Don pops a pill over deskside cocktails with Roger. Roger tells Don that they need someone younger on the coffee account. "Clients love young talent." Don suspects Duck's involvement. Paul has been tricked into providing a list of prospects. Don tells Roger to tell Duck that clients need to stand out, not fit in. Youth is a fad and young people don't know anything. Roger says fine, prove them wrong.
Don meets Betty at the Hotel Savoy. It seems that he has stopped fooling around in his spare time, perhaps as a result of Betty sneakily telling him via her psychiatrist (at the end of last season, recaps coming soon, I promise!) that she needs him to be faithful.
At the hotel, Betty runs into an old friend, Juanita, from her modeling days. Juanita is with an old guy named Curtis. She seems uncomfortable about giving Betty her phone number. She's wearing a two carat diamond, which she reluctantly tells Betty was a "gift." Later, Don tells Betty that Juanita is a "party girl" - a prostitute. Later, in the hotel room, Betty rationalizes about prostitution and wonders how much Juanita might get for a job.
Pete brings home some chocolate for Trudy. He scolds her for leaving a note in his lunch bag - Hildy, his secretary, saw the note. He demands a chocolate. Trudy's upset because her friend (wife of madman Harry, who kicked him out after he slept with a coworker on election night, but evidently took him back) is expecting a baby. Trudy is jealous of all the pregnant women she sees on the street, and feels left out. Pete doesn't seem to understand.
Back at the hotel, Don is having trouble in bed. (Known side-effect of Reserpine). Betty blames it on alcohol, but also thinks it's her fault and wants Don to tell her "what to do." They call for room service. Betty seems very choosy and indecisive about what she wants to eat.
They watch Jackie Kennedy giving a tour of the White House on TV.
Sal also watches, at home with a woman on his couch. (I can't tell whether that's Lois or not. If it is, her hair is different.) Sal wants to see JFK.
Joan is watching it on a date with her doctor boyfriend. He's horny, so she watches the show over his shoulder.
Pete is watching something else on TV, alone, eating Trudy's chocolates.
Next day, Betty's neighbor Francine is catty about Jackie Kennedy. She thinks that she and John F. looked phony as a couple. Betty says she and Don didn't have time to watch. Francine is jealous, but resigned to her fate as the wife of a philanderer who doesn't love her. Betty tells Francine about Juanita. In her version of the story, Betty's the one who figured out Juanita was a call girl, and Don agreed with her. Francine is titillated. Francine tells a story that when she was running low on money, she'd tell her dad she was going to Havana, and he'd send her money to place bets on his behalf. She didn't go to Havana, and kept the money.
The mad men are meeting at a big table in the main office instead of in the conference room. This was Paul's idea so that he can keep an eye on the activity in the office. Sure enough, two young men arrive for an interview. Paul is surprised to hear that Duck is trying to find younger people. (Some of the other mad men seem to know about it already). Ken feels sure that Don has something up his sleeve, that he'll eventually cause Duck to hang himself.
Don interviews the two guys. One of them is foreign, and his English is very poor, and he's wearing a bulky fisherman's sweater rather than a suit. They're not married, and they've spent their entire careers together (they're only 24 and 25). He asks if they've ever been fired. They both have the same last name (Smith... not a name you'd expect of a guy who doesn't speak English) and call themselves Kurt and Smitty. They're willing to share an office. Duck comes by to admire them. Smitty wants them to keep the meeting quiet (I don't know why). The youngsters leave. Don is sarcastic with Duck and insinuating that Duck can't really reel in the coffee client. Duck accuses Don of being narrow-minded.
Joan is trying to find a place for the new copy machine. It's in the hallway right now. She scolds Lois for crying in the break room. Joan tells her to be more respectful of Peggy. She and Lois look at the copy machine and agree that it can't stay in the hallway.
The madmen meeting has relocated to Pete's office. Peggy suggests marketing Clearasil to much younger girls even though they don't need pimple cream yet. Paul comes in, upset that two even younger guys have shown up for interviews. Peggy says she doesn't get it - she's only 22. "You don't count," Paul tells her. The meeting breaks up to celebrate Harry's (or is it Carey's - the captions aren't consistent) knocking up his wife.
Peggy is left alone with Pete. Pete grumps about kids and asks Peggy if she wants to have kids. "Eventually," she replies. Pete says, "Exactly!"
Peggy and Sal pitch their renovated Mohawk Airlines materials. Don is critical and detached. Today his mind is on sentiment and family. He goes off on Peggy for saying that sex sells, even though he's the one who mentioned short skirts yesterday. He lectures Peggy about how monkeys can't do their job. It's all about people feeling something. It's not about sex. (Sal loafs in the background; Don pretty much ignores him.) Finally Peggy comes up with an idea Don likes. A little boy at the airport asking, "What did you bring me, Daddy?"
Joan has found the ideal place for the copier: Peggy's office. People are Xeroxing their faces.
Two men are sharing graphic tales of seduction in the elevator in front of a very embarrassed woman. Don tells the mouthy man to take his hat off. Finally he takes it off for him.
Betty's car breaks down at night on her way to pick Sally up from ballet lessons. A passing woman agrees to send a tow truck.
Don comes home and pours himself a large drink. He offers Karla, the maid, a ride home. She looks at his full glass of scotch and says it's a nice night (actually, the street is wet) and she'll walk home.
The repair for the fan belt is $9. Betty has only $3. The mechanic offers to put the rest on account, but Betty doesn't want Don to know - he'll blame it on how she drives. The mechanic assures her it has nothing to do with that. She pours on the charm. He asks if she's bargaining. She pushes the point, somewhat playfully, and the mechanic agrees to do it for cost. She teasingly takes his hand as she offers the money. He pulls the money away from her and goes back to his truck.
That was weird. Was she hoping he'd ask for a special favor?
Don reads "Meditations in an Emergency" in his study. He writes a note on the cover: Made me think of you. He walks Polly, the dog, to the mailbox and ships the book off to some unknown person.
Advertising lesson: "There has to be advertising for people who don't have a sense of humor." (Don)
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